Mamafai's Daily Dose

The Proud Mama

I'm a 35 year old woman brought into this world on February 23rd 1971 and married to the same man for 13 years, mother to 2 hilarious, extremely handsome boys and one beautiful baby boy, who was totally NOT planned, but who turned out to be the Joy of our lives, loves to drink ice tea and hot chocolate from Starbucks. There is more to me than just being a mother, I just don't remember any of it.

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This site and contents, unless otherwise noted, is a copyright of mine! This website is a place for me to draw together all aspects of my life into an enjoyable and interesting journal. You will find issues that are truly going on in my life at the current moment. Sometimes I can be sharp. I am also very open with my feelings and opinions. If you are part of my life and I love you, you'll read about it in my journal. If you are an idiot, guess what? It's in here too. Feel free to respond if you choose. However, leave my website if you can't handle reality. I dont give a damn!

The Way I Am

Mamafai's Daily Dose...

Saturday, October 30, 2004

..: Raya Prep Part 1 :..

Bought this and some other stuffs last night. Big hole on Dh's pocket...heheh...but I'm loving it! (erm...the flowers I mean not the hole!) Tak berseri rumah tanpa bunga on Hari Raya :P Apa kata ibu-ibu semua?

Mamafai wrote @ 1:04 PM |

Thursday, October 28, 2004

..: Good Morning :..

It's been a busy morning as usual and I am dealing with major discipline issues with some employees.

Why can't people simply just act as adults when they are at work?

Mamafai wrote @ 10:46 AM |

Tuesday, October 26, 2004

..: Place An Order :..

Due to the overwhelming request, I will be taking orders for these 2 cakes for Hari Raya. The price of the chocolate fudge cake is $16 and for the marble fudge cake is $18. If anyone of you guys are interested, do e-mail me your orders. Free delivery for orders above $35.

Mamafai wrote @ 8:40 PM |

Monday, October 25, 2004

..: Babies :..

Its good to see her again. Now at 4 months and she is already at Afzal's shoulder.

Baby Iman & Baby Tua (Afzal)

Mamafai wrote @ 12:38 PM |

Friday, October 22, 2004

..: When I'm A Mother... :..

How can one small child carry so much defiance and personality that counters mine? Afzal does it with such ease, I sometimes wonder if he wasn't put on this earth strictly as a tool to cause havoc in my life and live out my mother's old saying, "When you have children, I hope they act JUST LIKE YOU."

Afzal's new word isn't just no. That would be easy. That would be quickly changed so that he learned not to say "no" to his mother. I AM his mother, after all.

But, no. He has to say, "No nooooo" with the final oooooo's all up turned in this cute harmonious sound. Yeah. he's cute when he says no.

I can remember all those mothers I snubbed and turned up my nose at when they looked away with amusement when their child behaved badly, and here I am, not only joining the ranks but seemingly leading them with my grin.

I take back all of those things I said when I wasn't a mother. I apologize for thinking that I could do it better. I apologize for all of those rolling of the eyes and the snippy, "Look at that mother, thinking that her child is just SOOOO cute when he's being a brat." I apologize for even THINKING the phrase, "When I'M a mother..." I apologize a million times over, no, a zillion times over.

And so now, I'm on the other side. The side that adores my child and realizes that faults are faults and that babies are babies. The kind that works really hard to discipline and correct "non-nice-ities" with love and laughter. With my apology comes a mother who loves her child, and who knows that you couldn't possibly understand until you have one of your own.

Mamafai wrote @ 5:44 AM |

Monday, October 18, 2004

..: I caught him :..

Asyraf had started to practise fasting this year. Caught him nearly taking a bite out of a Chipsmore biscuit yesterday.

At 3pm yesterday,

Me : Abang, what are you doing?

Asyraf : I am hungry ah ma...I'm thirsty ah ma..I cannot tahan.

Me : Sabarlah bang, sekejap jer lagi. Later we can all eat together ok?

Asyraf : Sekejap jer eh ma? Oh tadi abang nak test if the biscuit is basi. (there he goes again with all kind of excuses!)

Me : hmmm, the biscuit cannot basilah, no need to test test.

But he made a better progress yesterday than 2 days ago, he broke his fast at 5.30pm (can you believe that???). I made him eat some chipsmore biscuit during sahur this morning so today no more testing if the biscuit is basi!

Mamafai wrote @ 10:30 AM |

Wednesday, October 13, 2004

..: Brief Fires :..

Brief. That's how I would describe my entries of late. I've had dozens of things rolling around in my mind (as always, I guess) but I typically don't take the time to write them down.

Thus my briefness.

I'll be honest that I've been longing for some changes in my life, yet they are still too vague to follow through with. Or too complex to easily engage and feel as if I'm making progress.

I sometimes wonder if it is that complacency gets in the way of execution. Or is it lack of focus? Or lack of courage?

Maybe it's not being sure of that 1st step...
I just know of the longings and stirrings of desire - and the acrid stench of the extinguished fire.

and then, the flickers begin again...

hmm... on second thoughts, I think I am making some progress...

Mamafai wrote @ 11:01 PM |

..: Tuesday Revision :..

Things we learnt last night :

1) Time Freedom
2) Uncommon Freedom
4) Opportunity

Life's not a rehearsal, we live only once. It's not by chance nor by coincidence.

I am glad my 2 friends had made the right decision. (Thank you fren!)

Mamafai wrote @ 10:59 AM |

Tuesday, October 12, 2004

..: Busy Bee :..

What's up in your world?

I've been somewhat busy with work as usual and can't wait to leave the office to the centre for another session. Glad Dh will be coming along tonite with 2 of my other friends. Wish it will be as financially rewarding as it is mentally stimulating.

Mamafai wrote @ 5:32 PM |

Sunday, October 10, 2004

..: Making Out A Better Life! :..

It's amazing the difference a few hours of talk can make in how you feel. More confidence, motivated, better opportunites and am definitely looking forward for the next one!

What did I learn today? : No one can change your life but yourself!

Mamafai wrote @ 11:25 PM |

Friday, October 08, 2004

..: Brothers :..

Check this out! look at the way they sleep :)

Mamafai wrote @ 1:16 AM |

Wednesday, October 06, 2004

..: Guess What? :..

..It's still not Friday!!!..

Recieved this in my e-mail this morning from a fren :)

Mamafai wrote @ 11:12 AM |

Tuesday, October 05, 2004

..: Too Sleepy :..

I got very little sleep last night.I think maybe two hours. I really don't want to go to work this morning! And the time seems to go by so slowly.

Last night, we've decided to say goodbye to our Chariot. Dh is going down to meet up with the dealer today. Hmm..kindda sad but I guess we just need an economical one for now.

Mamafai wrote @ 3:30 PM |

Saturday, October 02, 2004

..: In the Face Of Change :..

What is change but a constant? Not only in our work lives, but our emotional, spiritual, intellectual, and physical lives as well. Work is actually just manner in which we occupy certain hours of our time re-allocating our intellectual, physical, emotional and spiritual resources. When I leave work, that allocation changes to maximize how best to interact with the new state. I actually have more than one new state after work: Mom, Mediator, Bath Giver, Diaper Changer, Story Teller. Of course, I have more than one state at work as well, when you break it down.

I do hold to the premise that we own our own change. How you choose to face or deal with it is completely up to you. While I believe we own our own change, sometimes our available options are less than ideal, which tends to negate feeling like we really own it. It is a Fact that Time is never Constant. There is never a Good Time.

So, while I may hope to have the power to manage my own situation with respect to "Accepting Change", I am quite aware I am impotent to affect any Change of My Own on the Existing Situation. Rather, I *do* have the option to Initiate My Own Change, which must result in Distancing Myself from the Existing Situation. Generally, it is My Experience that in the work area this is Not Career-Enhancing. Actually, unless you are a favored Friend Of The Boss, not much is Career-Enhancing these days so Who Cares Anyway?

That's what I have to say about being in the Face of Change. My Frustration with my Impotency to Affect Change on my Own Behalf is unsettling. Perhaps last night guests are the Signs of Change should I choose to accept it.

Mamafai wrote @ 11:01 AM |

Friday, October 01, 2004

..: Back At Work :..

Back at work today after 29days of break. The day started with a 2hours meeting (meaning - more work and more work to come!) and the rest of the day seems pretty smooth. Clearing about 400+ e-mails in my inbox which I felt it was never ending.

Glad to see her again at lunch. This was what we had and it was pretty good!

Looking forward for tonight. There'll be guests coming over!!!

Mamafai wrote @ 4:20 PM |