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 The Proud Mama

I'm a 35 year old woman brought into this world on February 23rd 1971 and  married to the same man for 13 years, mother to 2 hilarious, extremely handsome boys and one beautiful baby boy, who was totally NOT planned, but who turned out to be the Joy of our lives,  loves to drink ice tea and hot chocolate from Starbucks. There is more to me than just being a mother, I just don't remember any of it.

 Her Little  Princes

 She Reads

 Her Creations

Click here for the codes!
 

 Disclaimer

This site and contents, unless otherwise noted, is a copyright of mine! This website is a place for me to draw together all aspects of my life into an enjoyable and interesting journal. You will find issues that are truly going on in my life at the current moment. Sometimes I can be sharp. I am also very open with my feelings and opinions. If you are part of my life and I love you, you'll read about it in my journal. If you are an idiot, guess what? It's in here too. Feel free to respond if you choose. However, leave my website if you can't handle reality. I dont give a damn!
 

 She Listens To


The Way I Am
 


 

 

Mamafai's Daily Dose...

Monday, May 31, 2004

...: Flea Mart :..

Alhamdullilah all went well yesterday. Though not all items were sold, was kind of happy that I managed to bring back some $$$ - :). Tired but it was definitely fun. Lots of different kind of people that we met. Some were like trying to get the stuffs as cheap as possible and some just grabbed, paid and walked off. I definitely wanna do it again...


Thanks to all who came down to support us. Thanks to my partner for being such a great partner. Oh and of course to her bf, thanks for accompanying us there! For those who didn't turn up.. you've missed seeing her bf :P. Not forgetting my love who has been very supportive and for helping us to setup and close the stall!


And now...I am just going to enjoy my leave. I'd better do before I start the battle again on Thursday!


These are some of the stuffs we were selling, more in my photoblog.





*For those who couldn't make it, I'll put up some of the items for sale in my fotopages if I have the time.

Mamafai wrote @ 11:17 AM |

 

Saturday, May 29, 2004

..: Apologise :..

I apologise if my previous entry offended some of you. I didn't mean to blow up. I guess the situation I was in added to my frustration. Again, it was not a good excuse for me to do that. I do apologise again for my rudeness...

Mamafai wrote @ 8:46 PM |

 

Friday, May 28, 2004

..: Breathe in.. Breathe Out :..

I can think straight now. I've decided to put everthing behind my head, deal with it when the time comes and enjoy these moments while I can.

2 more days to the Flea Mart Sale. I have been looking forward for it and I do not want to spoil it with those thoughts that I am unsure of. Hope to see as much bloggers as possible on that day!



On the other hand, I had my dental appointment last night. Dr Sharifah, putting back the braces on my teeth as it had gone haywired... the retainers does not help. Its been 2 years since I last removed the braces, seems my teeth are still not stable.

5th of June is the day and there goes my nuts, chicken wings and chewing gums... Here comes the ulcers and the pains.

Mamafai wrote @ 3:34 PM |

 



..: Sleepless :..

I can't sleep. I have too many thoughts racing through my mind right now that I can't relax and fall asleep. I have to work tomorrow and I am definitely going to be exhausted.

I've been trying to calm down. I haven't been this sad in awhile. My poor kids are so confused as to why I am so emotional. My body is so out of whack right now...

Mamafai wrote @ 12:25 AM |

 

Thursday, May 27, 2004

..: Melancholy :..

Thanks for all the well wishes. The swelling on my eyes subsided yesterday...thank god its not the sore eyes and the drops really work very well but I am still feeling a little weak. Have not been eating well since yesterday.

I'm feeling a little down and blue today. Can't say much here right now. Dh and I made a rather big decision sometime back. I hope that we are doing the right thing. I feel in my heart that we are. Is there truly any closure when you are apart with someone that you love? I have yet to find out.

You know, it's funny how life has a way of preparing you for what is up ahead. You may not have realized it at the time but in hindsight, you will sometime see how certain experiences had a way of shaping you and prepping you for your future. It's almost like these experiences were brought into your life for that very reason to prepare you for the road ahead.

And now I am not sure if I am prepared for this :(

And this song makes me really wanna cry...


It's been a long and winding journey, but i'm finally here tonight
Picking up the pieces, walking back into the light
Into the sunset of your glory, where my heart and future lies
There's nothing like that feeling, when i look into your eyes...

My dreams came true, when i found you
I found you, my miracle...

If you could see, what i see, that you're the answer to my prayers
And if you could feel, the tenderness i feel
You would know, it would be clear, that angels brought me here...

Standing here before you, feels like i've been born again
Every breath is your love, every heartbeat speaks your name...

My dreams came true, right here in front of you
My miracle...

If you could see, what i see, you're the answer to my prayers
And if you could feel, the tenderness i feel
You would know, it would be clear, that angels brought me here...

Brought me here to be with you,
I'll be forever grateful (oh forever Faithful)
My dreams came true
When I found you
My miracle...

If you could see, what i see, you're the answer to my prayers
And if you could feel, the tenderness i feel
You would know, it would be clear, that angels brought me here...
Yes they brought me here...
If you could feel, the tenderness i feel...
You would know, it would be clear, that angels brought me here...


You might think this post makes no sense. Well, to me it does and that is all that matters. My blog, my whining, my therapy!

Mamafai wrote @ 1:09 PM |

 

Wednesday, May 26, 2004

..: Ya Give Me Fevaahhhh!!! :..

I'm sick. Fever's melting since last night. This morning when I woke, my throat seems closed, head just tripled in size and is pounding, my eyes are blurry, watery and it swells. Went to see the doctor but he can't confirmed if its sore eyes or the viral thingy. But according to him the sore-eyes virus is going around!

I am not allowed to go near the kids and I'm missing their kisses and that sucks!!!

Mamafai wrote @ 12:57 PM |

 

Monday, May 24, 2004

..: Bandwith :..

For those of you who are using my skins and experiencing the lost of your picture and background patterns, please download the pictures and background patterns on your own servers. My server was frozen due to the exceeded bandwith.

Go back to blogskins.com I have updated the links to download the pictures and backgrounds.

If you are not sure on how to edit the templates and insert your own links, do e-mail me and I'll help you out wih this.

Thank you for your support in using my skins. Appreciate your kind co-operation in this.

*Please take note that it is an offence to steal bandwith from others*

Mamafai wrote @ 10:35 PM |

 



..: More of Iman :..

Visited her yesterday. She had changed a little but still a sleepyhead. From the time we came till we left, she slept all the way :)



Mamafai wrote @ 10:38 AM |

 

Sunday, May 23, 2004

...: girls do it best :..

Girls do it best...




Mamafai wrote @ 2:06 AM |

 



..: weekend update :..

Went JB to do a little shopping yesterday. We had these for lunch :



I just love these garlic bread...


Mamafai wrote @ 1:53 AM |

 

Saturday, May 22, 2004

..: Brewing Secret! :..

Ok...can't keep this any longer. Please join me and her at the flea mart on 30th at Stall 41!


Mamafai wrote @ 1:32 AM |

 

Friday, May 21, 2004

..: Bad Mood :..

Beginning descent into a bad mood. Don't know why. Seems to be going around, though.

Hope after lunch and meeting her I will feel much better.

Mamafai wrote @ 12:05 PM |

 

Thursday, May 20, 2004

..: Not a Good Day Today! :..

That's all I have to say.

Mamafai wrote @ 9:33 PM |

 

Wednesday, May 19, 2004

..: Retreat II :..

What every woman would love to do!


Mamafai wrote @ 11:33 PM |

 



..: Smile! Smile! :..

As what DB had blogged, something's brewing up soon. Will blog about it more when everything has been finalise. I am so excited!!!

Ever since I started blogging, seems like my "friendship" network is getting larger and larger and I feel the world is getting smaller and smaller! :P

I received this quote in a surprise mail today from someone :) ...

"Everyday is a wonderful opportunity 2 Care, 2 Love, 2 Smile, 2 Pray & 2
be thankful 4 knowing a person like you. Take Care!!!. "

Mamafai wrote @ 11:45 AM |

 

Monday, May 17, 2004

..: Wedding :..

Fidah's Wedding photos! Congratulations to the couple!



Managed to make these puffs while the kids were sleeping...


Before it went to the oven.



Fresh from oven.



Mamafai wrote @ 3:21 PM |

 



..: Sickie :..

Well, Afzal's a sickie last night. He had a really rough day. He got up from his nap at 2am totally clingy and wouldn't let me put him down. He had refused his dad. He kept dozing off my shoulder. When I put him down, he started crying and want me to carry him till 5am this morning. He finally fell asleep till 7am. I had to call for urgent leave today.

It's tough when toddlers are sick. I mean, Asyraf is also down with runny nose and fever. Dh had to sponge him all night and I had to take over at 5am when Afzal finally was asleept but he wasn't acting like Afzal.

It's not even 1pm now and both boys are down for naps. I guess its the after effects of the medicine. Asyraf fell asleep at the couch and Afzal fell asleep on the floor. These viruses are really hitting them hard!

I just hope the boys are getting better soon and I 'm gonna take my bath now before they are awake again.

Mamafai wrote @ 12:41 PM |

 

Sunday, May 16, 2004

..: I'll Be There... :..

Beautiful, Vibrant and Classy.


Mamafai wrote @ 3:43 AM |

 



..: Hi Hi Bye Bye! :..

She went back yesterday afternoon. Miss her badly :(
Asyraf and Afzal too!



Love you so much girl!!!

Mamafai wrote @ 12:39 AM |

 

Saturday, May 15, 2004

..: Its back!!! :..

I hate being dependent on others. I like to know that I can take care of myself and that I can take on whatever life tosses my way. I am a strong woman, it takes a lot to knock me down and I never stay down.

However, there is one thing that never fails to make me run away screaming like a girl to the nearest hole so that I can hide and pray that it doesn't find me.

Yes, there is another lizard in the toilet. I feel like such a ninny, such a weakling, such a girlie girl- I hate feeling that way. But I can't handle knowing that there is a lizard within slithering distance from me. Give me cockroaches and I will take it on but lizards- no thanks. Shit I hate those damn things...

Of course, Asyraf and Afzal are in the toilet looking for the damn thing. Arghhh!!!

Mamafai wrote @ 10:06 AM |

 



..: Killing Me Softly :..

New skin...



Hip Hop and Refreshing.Now available on blogskin.

Mamafai wrote @ 3:52 AM |

 

Thursday, May 13, 2004

..: Sappy Moments :..

Do you ever look at pictures of your children and get overwhelmed with love? It's amazing and almost scary, the level of intense emotion, love that I feel when I look at my two kids.





I was just browsing through pictures of Afzal and tears came to my eyes because he's such a ittle thing and I love him so much. Big eyes, rounded cheeks, cute little ears, long fingers, small feet and powdery smell. My heart overflows...

I look down at Asyraf, who is sleeping right now and I plant kisses all over his cheek and thank god for sending him into my life. How could I have thought that I was complete before he was born? No longer a baby, think of his big eyes and feel such love. I think of his boisterous laugh and outgoing nature and feel such pride and love that such a sweet, charming, adorable little guy is my little guy...

It's amazing how a child can completely transform your entire life and in ways that you never imagined possible.

Ok, enough sap but sometimes, I get overwhelmed with love that I just have to share.. ;-)

Mamafai wrote @ 11:43 PM |

 



..: Dinner :..

Dinner with the girls was great. Enjoyed the company and food.
Looking forward for another session with them. "KEPLI PART II" :P





Click here for more pictures.

Mamafai wrote @ 12:04 AM |

 

Wednesday, May 12, 2004

..: Pissed off!!! :..

I'm pissy today. Damn pissy. Ever get in one of those moods where you would just love to take a baseball bat to the nearest object and wail on it? Perhaps Anger Management is in my future list of courses.

Just the thought of being around people makes my skin crawl because some stupid morons just have no brains!!!

Mamafai wrote @ 9:43 AM |

 

Monday, May 10, 2004

..: Working Woman :..

New template. It's now available at blogskins.com


Mamafai wrote @ 9:29 AM |

 

Sunday, May 09, 2004

..: Happy Mother's Day :..

A Card from Asyraf :



Happy Mother's Day to all Moms!!!

Mamafai wrote @ 11:06 PM |

 



..: Happy Birthday Princess! :..

Happy Birthday Princess!



The day was spent at the chalet yesterday to celebrate dearest niece's birthday. More pictures here.

Mamafai wrote @ 8:11 PM |

 

Thursday, May 06, 2004

..: Lost & Found :..

Hey if anyone is looking for their lost elephant, he's over here sitting on my chest. Please hurry over and pick him up soon.

Ugh! I feel like shit. My body aches- I can't even turn my neck. Shoot me please...

Yes, I know I am a drama queen when I am sick.

Mamafai wrote @ 8:03 PM |

 



..: Nur Iman :..

Here's the picture of the girl we've all been longing and waiting for. She's gonna be grandma's and grandpa's favourite apple soon! I have manage to sneak and snap her photo from the glass window. She is still not out from the special nursery as there were traces of blood infection in her :(

SIL - Be strong...everyone is praying for Iman and hopefully the blood result will be ok tomorrow!





p.s the white spots on her face are stains from the glass window.

Mamafai wrote @ 12:41 AM |

 

Tuesday, May 04, 2004

..: ooops :..

I had totally planned on going to bed early tonight, but as it's midnight I guess that didn't quite work out as planned. Oh well.. SIL is in labour ward now...this will be my first niece. Can't wait to see her...praying for you SIL...

SIL and the baby are coming back to my place when they are being discharge from hospital. I'll be so happy to have them around. The other 2 kiddos are already at my place today. Guess what will happen when the 4 boys get together? hmmm...mommies... u know I knowlah! The house has turned to football field!

Mamafai wrote @ 11:56 PM |

 

Monday, May 03, 2004

..: Vogue :..

Done with another new template. Codes are not updated yet on blogskins as the server is currently down. Will update it tomorrow!


Mamafai wrote @ 12:08 AM |

 

Sunday, May 02, 2004

..: Dessert today :..

Today's dessert :



And he simply loves it....


Mamafai wrote @ 6:28 PM |

 



..: yes or no? :..

I have been thinking a lot lately about whether or not I want another baby. Of course, my heart cries out yes!! but my mind keeps telling me that I am finished, that I have what I can handle and that I do not need to add to the clan.

After we had Asyraf , DH and I fell in love with being parents. We planned on having four. We now have two and I just have this feeling that this is it for us. I love being a mother. I enjoy playing with my kids, being a part of their lives. I enjoy watching them grow and learn. I get excited watching my baby become an individual with his own personality. I love watching my kids become little people. It makes me sad that I will not experience those "firsts" again. My heart feels heavy when I think that I will never experience the excitement of seeing a positive pregnancy test or the wonder of feeling that first kick. I get sad to think that I will never experience labor again, never again cry at the sight of my beautiful new sweetheart as he or she is placed on my belly after emerging from my womb.

Still, I think that I am done. Am I? I don't want to spoil my other children's lives by adding another kid to the fold and thus making life even more chaotic around here. I know that there are moms out there with more kids than I have but they seem to have that "special touch", a magic about them that makes them perfect to be the matriarch of a large family. I'm not so sure that I am that person. That makes me sad.

The bottom line comes down to this- my heart wants one thing and my head says another.... And dh wants to start trying...hmmm...


Asyraf did this during his tuition this morning. His first painting :) He's so proud of it.
Thanks to her. Asyraf loves every minute of his tuition and is always looking forward for it. Thanks Again! I knew he is in good hands :P

Mamafai wrote @ 12:04 AM |

 

 

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 Links

Perfect Frosting
Mamafai's Multiply
 

 Contacts

Personal: fairani.ahmad@gmail.com
Business: perfectfrosting@gmail.com