Mamafai's Daily Dose

The Proud Mama

I'm a 35 year old woman brought into this world on February 23rd 1971 and married to the same man for 13 years, mother to 2 hilarious, extremely handsome boys and one beautiful baby boy, who was totally NOT planned, but who turned out to be the Joy of our lives, loves to drink ice tea and hot chocolate from Starbucks. There is more to me than just being a mother, I just don't remember any of it.

Her Little Princes

She Reads

Her Creations

Click here for the codes!

This site and contents, unless otherwise noted, is a copyright of mine! This website is a place for me to draw together all aspects of my life into an enjoyable and interesting journal. You will find issues that are truly going on in my life at the current moment. Sometimes I can be sharp. I am also very open with my feelings and opinions. If you are part of my life and I love you, you'll read about it in my journal. If you are an idiot, guess what? It's in here too. Feel free to respond if you choose. However, leave my website if you can't handle reality. I dont give a damn!

The Way I Am

Mamafai's Daily Dose...

Friday, April 30, 2004

..: hello neighbour :..

Today at work was madness. It was practically worst than any normal Mondays. But at the end of the day, there was something to laugh at. There was a complaint customer who was at the office earlier, threatening to write to forum, requesting for a compensation for his time (he was a taxi driver lah!). A couple of people spoke to him, still insisted to his request. Case was finally escalated to me. When I enter the room where he was waiting...both of us (customer and me) could not help but burst into laughter. He was my neighbour...said "hello" to him every morning and he did drive me to work one morning when I called for a taxi :). Well things went quite well with him...glad to serve you today Mr Customer! :)

Ok...I am so tired of my stupid freezy hair..decided to straighten them. Thanks to Trina for the tips! I am not sure how its gonna look like cause its still in the process. Work or not, I don't really care... noone's gonna look at it anyway! :P

Mamafai wrote @ 11:59 PM |

Wednesday, April 28, 2004

..: Missing :..

I've missed creating blogskins. I simply couldn't find anytime for myself this week. By the time I reach home from work, I'll either have to sit with Asyraf to do his homework or I'll be too tired to sit infront of my pc. I have lots of ideas lately but I just couldn't find time to work on them. *sigh*. I hope I can come out with something by this weekend.

Mamafai wrote @ 9:33 AM |

Tuesday, April 27, 2004

..: Spelling my name :..

FAIRANI.

F-A-I-R-A-N-I

Is it really so difficult? Really?

Many times I get an e-mail response from someone starting, "Farini,"

Farina or even Ferari. I've never even heard of anyone called Ferrari except for a car!

These are people who have already seen my name in type and are responding to something I wrote them.

What's so freaking hard about it?

And when I tell people how to spell my name, they will still make the same mistake.

What's wrong with these people?

Mamafai wrote @ 2:55 PM |

Monday, April 26, 2004

..: Lesson to learn :..

There is always going to be someone that just simply does not like you. Period. Call it a conflict of personality. Call them a stuck up bitch. Call it whatever. The fact of the matter is...not everyone is going to like you.

And that's ok. You know why? Because you don't like every person that you meet either.

It took me a little while to learn this lesson. I can be very sensitive at times- my feelings can get hurt a little too easily sometimes. However, once accepting that I can't please everyone and that not everyone is going to like me (this sounds so childish, doesn't it? lol), I was a much happier person.

Now if a few people that I know could simply learn this lesson, life would go so much smoother for them.

Mamafai wrote @ 8:24 PM |

Sunday, April 25, 2004

..: Quality Time :..

The time spent with the family on my anniversary was all I was looking forward to. We went out for dinner to eatz19 last night. (You might wonder...again??? hehe..but dh had never been there). The kids love their fish and chips. Afterwhich we had brought the kids to Clarke Quay for a boat ride along Singapore River. I was contemplating at first if I'd wanted to bring the kids along... but I knew I would feel guilty to enjoy myself when the kids had to be home. Guess what??? I am very happy to see them happy and on top of that all us of enjoyed ourselves last nite. Thanks to DH for not working!!! :P

Click here for more photos.

Mamafai wrote @ 10:55 PM |

Saturday, April 24, 2004

..: Marriage :..

Today, 11 years ago was the day of our solemnisation. My life has changed since I met DH and we got together. DH proposed to me after a year of being together. It took him another 4 months to convince me to marry him and another year of engagement.

Now this marriage has been the single biggest learning experience of my life. It is an ongoing one. I learn something new on a daily basis about myself, my husband and marriage. Some good, some bad- some quite ugly. But all of it worth learning. I have learned to compromise. I have learned to laugh things off when I felt like hurling an object. I have learned that just because this way works for me, that it doesn't always work for DH and that is O.K.

I still struggle with learning how to be tactful with my husband. I am still learning to let things go in an argument. I'm coming along but I still have a little more to learn in those areas.

I have learned that it is ok and perfectly normal to need my space. I have learned that on some days, I want nothing more than for DH to get out of my face. I have learned that on other days, I want him around me all day long. I have learned that DH feels the same way about me sometimes. lol! Personal space in a marriage is so important- at least it is for my marriage.

I have learned that the cute little whistle that DH makes while snoring is no longer cute after 11 years. :P I have learned that I am not always right. I have learned that DH doesn't like my hair too short. I have learned that I don't like his long. I have learned that while I despise my body that my husband loves it the way it is. I have learned that morning breath really isn't that horrible, that one can kiss someone whose breath stinks. :P

Marriage is an ongoing learning experience and if you don't pay attention, it is easy to fail at it. DH and I have had our troubles. I'm glad that we realized where we were headed before it was too late. I hope and pray that we both learn from the past so that we don't get to that point again in the future.

My marriage isn't perfect. It still requires a lot of tweeking and rearranging. At the same time, it is a pretty damn good marriage and a solid one at that. I married a good man. I married a man that respects and listens to what I have to say. I married a man that makes me laugh. I married a man that has made me cry (good tears). I have married a man that constantly challenges me and makes me stop and think. I like that and I know that I do the same for him.

I love you very much dear! Happy Anniversary!

Mamafai wrote @ 2:18 PM |

Thursday, April 22, 2004

...: Report :..

I was driving along CTE towards City this morning at 8.30 am when car SFAXXXXX suddenly did a jam break. Car SDWXXXXX was not able to stop the car and had hit car SFAXXXXX. Car SDCXXXXX which was behind car SDWXXXXX was also not able to stop the car and he had hit car SDWXXXXX. I saw the accident and was also not able to stop my car on time and had hit the rear of car SDCXXXXX.

This was what had been reported to IDAC
(Independent Damage Assesment Centre) this morning at 10.30am. No one was injured but I am still in the state of SHOCK!

Mamafai wrote @ 4:46 PM |

Wednesday, April 21, 2004

..: Insecurities :..

I wish that children came with a handbook, some sort of written instructions or a tutorial because sometimes I don't think I know what the hell I am doing raising my kids. I worry that I am going to spoil them up, drive them into years of therapy in the future, say or do the wrong thing that is going to somehow deter them from becoming who they were meant to become.

I worry about their self esteem and confidence. I worry about whether or not I yell too much, nag too much or if I am too strict with them. Then I worry about whether or not I am strict enough. Do I let them get away with too much or too little? I worry that sometimes I am a mean mum.

On most days, I feel pretty confident that I am doing a pretty decent job raising my brood but sometimes, I get a little insecure. I want them to have fond memories and happy tales to share with their grandkids one day. I want them to be fun loving, giving and thoughtful people. I want them to be energetic, easy going and stable people. I also want them to have productive lives and to be responsible, self sufficient and caring people.

I just hope that I am able to pull it off so that they are all of those things.

hmmmm...*sigh*

Mamafai wrote @ 12:08 AM |

Sunday, April 18, 2004

..: Cuppa Tea :..

Oh I forgot to mention that I have uploaded all my templates at blogskins. This is another template done tonight.

Search for mamafai in blogskins to look for my templates. Do rank me if you are using any of the templates.

Mamafai wrote @ 9:59 PM |

..: Dinner Last night :..

DH knew I was kindda upset with him yesterday. To make it up to me, he drove us to JB for dinner :)

This was some of the stuff we had. More on my photoblog.

We are off to a wedding and MIL's place. Enjoy the rest of your weekend pple!

Mamafai wrote @ 11:22 AM |

Friday, April 16, 2004

..: Negative Stuffs :...

A friend of mine commented that my blog is always about all the negative stuff and seldom of the good stuff that happens being a mom. Well I do not agree with that, even if my blog can be negative at times, and with reasons, as I will list below:

1) This blog is not about the entirety of being a mom. It's a place to vent my frustrations and say what I wanna say.

2) My sons are not the easiest kid. They are far from the hardest but is not the easiest.

3) If this was a blog about a happy motherhood all the time, it would be less entertaining, wouldn't it?

4) Blogging is better than child abuse or yelling, and cheaper than therapists.

So keep in mind, if you know me in person or not, I am not all negative, I do have my upbeat side! You just won't see too much of it here.

Mamafai wrote @ 10:39 PM |

Wednesday, April 14, 2004

..: DO IT!!! :..

Dear Body,

Please make up your mind!!! I've had cramps, bloating, extreme bitchiness, and a damn migraine from hell for the past TWO days. Either go into menstruation or cut this shit out. I have had about all that I can take. I'm tired of popping painkillers like as if its sweets and stuffing myself with Kit Kat chocolate bars every other hour. STOP THE INSANITY! I'm either going to end up in the hospital due to a chocolate overdose or prison because I finally snapped and kill someone!

Whatever you decide to do, just DO IT. I'm sick of this waiting!

Sincerely,
Me

Mamafai wrote @ 10:18 PM |

Monday, April 12, 2004

..: Headache is back! :..

Afzal snuck into my drawer earlier and took a bottle of my perfume. He sprayed it all over himself, the bed, his brother, the hall carpet and my bathroom. My entire house now reeks of Anais Anais. To make matters worse, I can't stand this perfume in the first place. It gives me a headache when I spray it on lightly so I know I am in for a hell of a headache since my house now reeks of the crap. The migraine beast is knocking at my door upon smelling the overwhelming stench that is now permeating throughout my house. Yucks!

Mamafai wrote @ 10:36 PM |

..: Stupid People! :..

I'm really hating work today because of stupid, lazy people. As the saying goes, if you want something done right, DO IT YOURSELF.

The only problem with that is the stupid, lazy people do nothing and I have to do all their work to ensure it gets done right. Why do they get paid a salary if I'm going to do their work?

Mamafai wrote @ 12:08 PM |

Sunday, April 11, 2004

..: Stupid Bottle! :..

Want to know what pissed me off just now?

I just spent a good 10 minutes in the kitchen trying to open a bottle of jam. I think I did permanent damage to my wrist trying to twist that stupid lid off. I banged on the lid. I heated the lid. Nothing worked. I actually broke a sweat trying to open that stupid thing. Whatever calories I was going to gain from that jam just got canceled out from the energy I used trying to make the jam sandwich in the first place.

Dh walks into the kitchen. Smile at me and picks up the bottle and with a simple twist of his wrist, the stupid thing opened right up for him. Damn it! Pisses me off. I hope he knows that the only reason that it opened up for him was because I loosened it up for him first. He handed me the bottle and patted me on the head. He just lost out on a sandwich with that move!

Mamafai wrote @ 10:06 PM |

..: Retreat :..

Another new template. Keep having new ideas. This one is one of my favourite.(for now..hehe) I find the gals are very cute! And of course thanks to Herda for using "Circles of Love". Thanks for the support! :).

Click here to view it bigger.

Mamafai wrote @ 2:29 AM |

Friday, April 09, 2004

..: Circles of Love :..

Done with another template - "Circles of Love"

Click here to view it bigger.

Mamafai wrote @ 9:04 PM |

..: The Bath War :..

Trying to get Asyraf to take a bath is like trying to negotiate a peace treaty in the Middle East. At first it sounds like it might be a good idea and then something happened and screw the whole thing up.

When I announced that it was bathtime, he headed to the kitchen bathroom. Once he is there, he changed his mind. Same thing everyday (bibik told me). Earlier he refuses to take a bath and I quote what he said, "This is my body not yours, Mama and I cannot smell anything stinky so I am not going to take a bath. You can go take a bath with your body if you want."

sigh...

Mamafai wrote @ 6:44 PM |

..: Remote :..

Sometimes I wish I could have a remote control that I could use on Dh. Something with a mute button and a rewind button would be great. That way when he starts flapping his lips and I don't want to hear it, I can just mute him. As for the rewind button, well that would certainly come in handy when I ask him to do something and he scoffs at me and walks away from me mid-sentence. I could just rewind him right back where he was and then start him over at the beginning only this time he would smile, nod and say "your wish is my command, my dear and precious wife."

And hey, it would also be great to have an on/off switch for the kids. This remote can sure come in handy at times in my life! :P

btw...pls don't tell Dh I wrote this tonite!

Mamafai wrote @ 12:38 AM |

Thursday, April 08, 2004

..: A Quikie Post Before Bed ..:

I feel disconnected today - totally emotionless. I hate it when I get like this, it is like I am on auto-pilot and just going through the motion of living and working.

I hope it passes soon!

Mamafai wrote @ 12:23 AM |

Tuesday, April 06, 2004

..: Headache Monster :..

Go away. Go away. Go away. Go away. GO AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Please! I have had this monster beast of a headache for 2 days now. My eyes ache. My neck throbs. My head feels swollen. I can't stand sound or light. My stomach is all messed up. Just turning my head to the side send shooting flames of pain all over my brain. I just want to crush my skull between a vice grip and squeeze out the pain.

What makes this worse is the fact that I have two very active children who don't understand why Mama can't play with them or why Mama just wants to lay in a dark room. My poor kids, I feel so bad for them but I literally can't stand to move.

So please, Mr. Headache- GO AWAY. I have a life to live here- things to do, children to love on, people to avoid, blogs to read.

Mamafai wrote @ 7:55 PM |

Monday, April 05, 2004

..: Self Pity Time :..

I hate being sick. It seems that I have been sick every now and then. What happened to my immune system?!?! Is it even there anymore? I swear I catch every bug, virus, and whatever that is going around.

Last night, I was down with fever and cold. Totally blows. I can't talk. I can barely swallow due to my sore throat. I kept coughing last night and I sounded like Darth Vader!

Asyraf thinks it rocks that Mama can't talk. Means he can do just about anything he wants and he doesn't have to hear me nag. Then again, I feel so shitty that he could burn down the house and I probably wouldn't care much.

The couch has been my friend today. I have just layed there, in my own misery, wishing for a release from this hell that I am living. A bit dramatic? Perhaps but you don't know how truly shitty I feel right now. lol

Waaaaahhhhh..... And my poor Afzal still has a nasty cold so he is just as miserable as I am. Not fun.

Mamafai wrote @ 6:39 PM |

Sunday, April 04, 2004

..: Good Morning :..

Even though I am not actually a "morning person", I do love the early mornings that we share around here. It really is the best time of the day for me. My kids are early risers. I love how my kids smell in the morning - I can still get a whiff of their shampoo when I nuzzle their necks. They are still warm and cozy from sleep-making them extra soft and cuddly. The four of us just lay there, one big happy family cuddled together. Enjoying each other's presence. I am thankful for this time. It allows me to make amends for the previous day's mistakes. It gives me a chance to strengthen my resolve to be a better mommy today. These mornings are about renewal and second chances.

I love how Afzal curls right up to my side - almost like he is trying to mold himself into me. His hands play with my hair as he lays next to me, content as can be. Asyraf, all curled up in dh's armpit (his favorite place-lol), is giggling and babbling. That is what I like to think. Every now and then, they will give us a little kiss or an extra squeeze. Such loving little things..

Dh and I will share a quiet, lazy conversation while the kidds love on us. It really is the best time of the day. We will share a good laugh when Asyraf interjects with his view of the world around him - he comes up with such funny little things. Man, I love my children! They make this life worth living.

After awhile we will drag ourselves from our warm cocoon and head to kitchen for breakfast. The magic doesn't end there - we took our meal while talking and laughing together. To me, this is what family is about. I am blessed to have these little moments in my life. I hope one day, my children will look back on these mornings and know the love that I had for them, the love that I will always have for them.

What a wonderful way to start the day!

Mamafai wrote @ 11:37 AM |

Saturday, April 03, 2004

..: Pandans in the air :..

I've been on pins and needles all day. I have no idea why. It's like I am expecting something but my conscious mind is not aware of it. There just seems to be a strange energy in the air around me today. I can't tell if it is positive or negative but there is definitely something going on. There is a message that is trying to get to me but I am unable to decipher the meaning. I'm becoming restless and anxious to know what is around the corner that I should be prepared for.

Even my kids seem to sense it as they have been unusually calm and subdued today. This makes me nervous as I like to know what is going on. Perhaps I am making something out of nothing but I don't think so.

The scary thing is, I keep smelling pandans. I don't have any pandans in the house. Not even pandans scented candles. Dh smells it too. Weird.

I will stop rambling before I really convince you all that I am losing my mind.

Mamafai wrote @ 10:53 PM |

..: New Home :..

Welcome to my new home. Finally... I've decided to move on to blogspot. Please do relink me to this new site. I am still working on the template. Pls endure with me for the time being.

The break was good. A little tired though. I haven't got enough sleep since last night. The kids are down with cold and fever. I guess they've played too much but they have definitely enjoyed themselves. The pictures are up now. Click here to view them.

Mantra of the Day :

I will not be grouchy
I will not be grouchy
I will not be grouchy
I will not be grouchy
I will not be grouchy

Mamafai wrote @ 11:55 AM |